It’s June 2025 and I’m finally posting this story here….

I wasn’t sure if I wanted to put this on my website, but today I decided I want to as I believe it’s important.

I’ve never donated anything “body-wise” in my life (except hair, once). I have low blood pressure, so I’ve never even donated blood. I’ve always wanted to donate my organs though, so I guess I signed up to be a bone narrow donor too some day in 2016 (I still don’t remember this day, lol, but I’m glad I did).

I think I’ve never considered I could actually match someone in need of something mine while I’m alive. I used to think “sure, when I’ll be dead, I’ll probably never know if I could actually be a donor, but I hope I could!”

I’ve never heard about anyone actually matching a total stranger, so that’s why it never crossed my mind about the bone narrow donation.

Anyways, thing is that I actually matched someone in need in 2023. Not only matched, but I was highly compatible (plus than 80% something).  Once I understood how rare it is to match a total stranger like that, I was in BLISS. I said “lady, I don’t care where this person is, I’ll go”. I started imagining crossing the planet to make the donation (silly, I know), which sounded crazy and scarry because I’ve never been abroad and I don’t travel much. But the person could be ANYWHERE on Earth, so I had to accept the terms and be prepared to travel long distances.

Then, after a few days of back and forth calls, the lady said I should repeat the blood exams just for them to be sure (because my other blood sample was 7 years old). I should then travel to the capital of my state to do that and I mentioned I was going to travel there anyway in a few days for a return from my last endoscopy, which was made 3 months before that.

She then stopped talking. Then she started talking to other people. Then she confirmed with me what I just said. And then, finally, she said I couldn’t donate because I’ve done an endoscopy recently. One doctor talked to me after that, to confirm the information. My file would have to be suspended for 6 months starting from the date of my exam, and then I’d be back on the list.

She didn’t even say if I could donate to that patient anymore. She only said “you’ll be back on the list.”

I couldn’t believe it.

An endoscopy I did “just for a check-up because I was moving back to the countryside and wouldn’t be back in the capital for some time” took me the chance to save someone. I felt devastated. Guilty. Stupid.

I know, rationally, I couldn’t know before then. But I still felt like I killed someone. I could have given someone’s hope. The family, the mother…. and then I took it away. My fault.

I cried a lot. Then I thought maybe that person was lucky to find another highly compatible donor. But I know, chances are, they didn’t. I’ll never know… And I didn’t even know who they were, where they were, what happened.

That’s why it took me a bit more than 2 years to process everything. After that, I didn’t receive any message, any call, anything. I guess I’m “back on the list”, so my only hope is that I can be lucky again to try saving someone like that in my lifetime.
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